ANON POST 85, THE REDUX

[etherslash]

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

There is someone I desire to notice me. I demand you instruct me on the most efficient way to attract his attention.

[(Anonymous)]

Just tell him that you demand he pay attention to you! Done. Simple, right?

[(Anonymous)]

He ignores me.

I was once told he wanted to speak with me on the phone but when I leapt across a great void to catch it, I only heard a dial tone. I do not think I moved fast enough. I should make myself faster.

[(Anonymous)]

Uh... Why not just save his number and keep a phone on you? That sounds easier.

[(Anonymous)]

HELP! the guy i like is giving me mixed signals!!!!!!

[(Anonymous)]

DEETS

[(Anonymous)]

wellll there was this party ~ he was all over me but then i went ACROSS THE GLOBE to be with him and now he wants to have sex with his food. he threw me out of his bed. you will not even believe the things he asked me to do at that party. it was SCANDALOUS.

[(Anonymous)]

ooh ooooooooh tell me!!!! what kind of party? was there alcohol? was he drunk? how open is he about his sexual desire? WHAT KINDS OF SCANDALOUS THINGS DID HE SAY?

don't worry, i'll help you out! (و ˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و

[(Anonymous)]

looking for someone to help install a fence outside of my apartment building because i have a black beast infestation ☉▵☉

[(Anonymous)]

A what?

[(Anonymous)]

A fence. Preferably a very big fence.

[(Anonymous)]

No, I know what a fence is. I meant the black beast infestation.

[(Anonymous)]

I can't tell whether or not the guy I like is teasing me or not. There's no way he'd be into someone like me, and typically I wouldn't even question it, but he keeps asking me to sleep with him and grilling me on my nonexistent love life. How am I supposed to deal with that? I've had a crush on him since forever!

[(Anonymous)]

someone like you? please elaborate. ♥

[(Anonymous)]

A dime a dozen professional figure skater who gains weight when he eats too much katsudon off season, can't see the scoreboard without glasses, and named his dog after his idol. One time when I was fourteen I kissed a poster of him and then I was too humiliated to sleep in my room for a week.

That's him, by the way. The guy I like. He's been my idol for as long as I've been skating. I seriously need him to stop messing with my head like this... Do you see the problem here?

[(Anonymous)]

Just to clarify in this thread are you saying that you kissed a poster of Viktor Nikiforov? Asking for a friend!

[(Anonymous)]

DID YOU KNOW KUNIKIDA HAS "DAD" TATTOOED ON HIS LOWER BACK AND IT'S OFF CENTER BECAUSE HE WAS DRUNK ENOUGH TO GET "DADDY" BUT PASSED OUT

FLAGGED FOR HARASSMENT

[(Anonymous)]

THIS IS UNTRUE. MODERATOR, PLEASE DELETE THIS SLANDER.

[(Anonymous)]

haha you think this thing has mods

you also haven't looked at your back lately have you

[(Anonymous)]

Why won't everyone stop talking about their crushes.

[(Anonymous)]

I do not know. It is very offensive because crushes are stupid.

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah. They are. Stupid crushes on people who do stupid things.

[ridindirty]

Here I thought I needed therapy. You people are something else.

[adhered]

It's like a trainwreck, isn't it? You can't look away. I've neglected paperwork for this.

[ridindirty]

I've been reading it for the last half an hour. What do you say I ask Karol to recruit this entire lot into Brave Vesperia?